Divine Procrastinations

お帰りなさい! Welp, I have made it through my first week of my last Japanese class! The class is a lot of fun, actually! We are reading “Kozo no Kami” (“The Ant God”?) and some other short stories like “Torokko” (“Mining Truck”?).. I’m not sure exactly how you would translate either of those.. guess I still have to work on my Japanese skills .. 🙂 It will be fun, though! It honestly feels like I am stretching and working out a muscle that I have neglected for a while now, so it’s good to get back into the language. I have my first test coming up soon though, so we will see how it all goes! Luckily, I don’t have to write kanji (漢字) but instead just have to translate and do some kanji readings. That’s quite the relief since kanji characters are my weak point, and writing is all the more difficult.

So I have a rant today that I’d love to share! I’m going to try and be short since I want sleep.. I have quite the week ahead, full of work, class, dates, and comedy.

Divine Procrastinations. At church today we spoke about what we really think is important in life, what we are doing to achieve those things, and what keeps us from actually doing them. I like to take these questions seriously and so I thought about what really held me back from being/doing the spiritual things I know are most important to me. I feel that the most important thing in life is serving the Lord and overcoming the temptations that keep me from not wanting to serve Him. D&C 4:2 “Therefore, O ye that embark in the service of God, see that ye serve him with all your heart, might, mind and strength, that ye may stand blameless before God at the last day.

The weakness that hits is that I rationalize, along with EVERYBODY else, why today is not the day to work my hardest at becoming Christ-like. See, when I was a missionary I knew I had 2 years to work my hardest to spread the gospel of Jesus Christ. And I knew that the stronger and more developed my Christ-like attributes were then the better the tool I would be for the Lord. When I wanted to be more patient and humble, then I had to be patient and humble AS SOON AS POSSIBLE so that I could be a benefit to the Lord. I worked on it hard for weeks at a time! Now that I’m home from my mission when I think, “Oh, I should work on patience..” I then think, “Meh.. I’m sure I’ll learn it before I die.. or, before I have a family. I’m fine for now..” I have no desire to work my hardest to serve God “with all [my] heart, might, mind and strength..” unless I know it is necessary for me. If I knew I was going to die in 2 years I know I would be working A LOT harder on my spiritual self than I am now.

And that’s what Divine Procrastinations are; Divine not because they are given by God, but because they are procrastinations given with a divine perspective in mind. God wants us to repent TODAY. And He wants us GOOD and BETTER than ever before! He wants the best for us because He loves us SO much! We are only limiting ourselves by our own stupid lack of discipline! I hate my lack of discipline and lack of motivation! That’s the whole point! To overcome those weaknesses of the flesh and to consciously decide, That’s it! I am going to work at my sins! I am going to work at my shortcomings and work out my salvation, “with fear before God..” (Alma 34:37) knowing that if I DON’T then YES I will be eternally ruined!

So NO, I don’t want to procrastinate my salvation! I DON’T want to procrastinate my repentance! I’m here to SERVE the Lord! I’m here to be HIS servant to those around me! Listen to what Nephi says about his own sins at first, and then the language he has upon committing his heart to this change; 2 Ne. 4:17 “O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities.” Have you ever heard such personal pains in the scriptures? The only other is Christ, it seems. Then Nephi lists all the miracles and blessings that God has given him through his life and culminates in his famous Psalm of Nephi in verse 28, “Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul.”

Alma 34:33, “…do not procrastinate the day of your repentance until the end; for after this day of life, which is given us to prepare for eternity, behold, if we do not improve our time while in this life, then commeth the night of darkness wherein there can be no labor performed.”

Let us all go forward with faith and strength to fight off the temptations that beset us, and to become the pure testimony of Christ in word, action and thought. As we do we will truly work out our own salvation.


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1 Comment

  1. Mom

     /  June 30, 2009

    Great thoughts! Thank goodness we are not required to be ‘perfect’ in this life…only that we are on the path to perfection.

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